I'm in class.  I should be working on my paper.  My head is pounding.  It took me until now to figure out why.  I purged really hard lastnight and so I strained my brain.  I was very productive around the house last night.  Proud of myself.  With the  oogies going on I have been such a slacker.  I'm feeling some better.  

Tomorrow I have tons to do.  Pepper has her birthday breakfast on Sat.  I am so excited.  I can't believe she is seven.  Syd has a concert tonight.  I am having serious issues.  Doc wants me to go.  I want to go.  But I am having a problem with his mother.  MIL. I've lost all respect and tolerance for her.  She has stooped to a new level and I don't know if I can go and be nice to her.  I stopped kissing her hiney and she is being a total witch.  I just can't do it anymore.  I can't play the game of trying to be something I'm not.  I don't like being part of her snubbish snobbish lifestyle.    I just can't do it anymore. It's taken me months to find myself again. I was so thrilled to put my boots on (they had dust on them it had been so long) and go to the stable.  I'm rusty.  I bounced all over the horse because my post is to weak.   
It really struck me when she made fun of my friend Melinda and her strong WV accent.  She poked at the way she sang.  I was so angry.  So that is when it stopped.  I stopped calling to make arrangements for them to be with the kids.  I stopped running errands for her.  I stopped answering the phone when she called.  I was blunt with my husband about how I felt.  It was like an awakening.  Like I saw for the first time how I was acting to impress other people.  I was trying to be just like Val.  
I AM SORRY.

Rant... 


So I'm tired.  I forgot my lunch.  I'm going to head home after this class.  Finish the laundry and make beds.  I have to find a new sitter.  I have a little chick from church in mind, its just getting a minute to sit down with her and see what she thinks.  I need someone more fulltime for the summer while I am doing my internship.  I'm really nervous.

Well I need to get going for now. 
  

Words from my mother this morning.  I told her I wanted to F*ing choke my sister.  It was expected.  Jen and I are 11 months apart.  We fight constantly.  But we love one another.

I'm exausted.  Doc was snorring all morning, he got home at 4am and I still have the weezing coughing sneezing stuffy head so I can't sleep.  I'm in class now.  Not doing what I should.  I'm miserable.  Doc and I are celebrating our anniversary today.  We have dinner reservations.  I feel horrible but I don't want to ruin the evening.  I took some dayquil stuff.  It has done nothing.  I must pull it together for tonight.  He got me a super cute card.  It was tapped to my mirror.  He said there was another but I had to find it... hmm.

I didn't accomplish much last night.  Got my hair done and cleaned out our bath.  Then I took some cold med and crashed.  So much I wanted to get done.  It will have to wait until tomorrow.

I'm so whiny.  I need a nap.

Okay, I must change the picture there. I don't like that one anymore.
So I had a really busy weekend planned. Lists of things I wanted to do, and... I got none of them done! Surprise! Yeah so I caught a little bug from Bay. His kisses are totally worth it though. I am so in love with that little boy. He makes me gush. Seriously he has me wrapped around his finger. Anyhow. I hung out with the kids all weekend. Today I am playing catch-up on my lists. I got into the tanning bed. I'm getting my hair done tonight, getting my work out in and hope to get my pedi done before bed. I have a chrome polish picked out. Everyone is out so I have the house to myself. I'm going to watch all the sleazy reality TV. that I won't let my kids see and taking a long bath.

I haven't updated in a while so I suppose I will do that. Doc and I are doing really good. Things have been rocky though. Tomorrow is our 2^nd anniversary. We have plans to go out to dinner and have a romantic evening. Our kids are doing great. Baylan is 4 now are such a blast. Hannie and Pepper are both doing fantastic in school, we are planning out our summer. Evan is getting geared up for another year of baseball and Syd is singing in all county Corus. My sisters are all doing great. My youngest sister’s baby is 7months old now, Jen just bought a new house, Bobbi finished RN school and Lisa is still teaching Jr. High English. Our brother is busy with his baby girl, Brandi. Brandi is graduating from OSU this June and getting married. So proud of her.

As for me, not so much to report. I’m busy being an intern and going to classes. I graduate in June. I’ve become a bit of a recluse this past year. So I’m struggling to get back out in the real world. Keeping up with my studies has been so hard to keep a social life. This is something I am working on. I just don’t know where to start.

So I guess I need to get going. I still have a ton of things to do.